








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 145 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 127 matches | ||
| Faceit | 56 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




86 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2427 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,375 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1491 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1718 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1332 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1834 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $692,590 of utility $159 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1449 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wipeout | 100% | 17 |
| #2 | 𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖕𝖍<3 | 92% | 12 |
| #3 | Jaysling | 77% | 128 |
| #4 | pepo | 75% | 101 |
| #5 | DropShot | 74% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pepo | 41 | 0.0190 |
| #2 | Jaysling | 39 | 0.0154 |
| #3 | Nzk | 16 | 0.0202 |
| #4 | Pietpomper | 12 | 0.0424 |
| #5 | Lepep | 8 | 0.0084 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jaysling | 574 | 0.23 | 14 min |
| #2 | pepo | 352 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #3 | Nzk | 128 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #4 | Lepep | 106 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #5 | DropShot | 98 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DropShot | +5.64 | 92 | 68 |
| #2 | Jaysling | +3.78 | 83 | 60 |
| #3 | wipeout | +2.87 | 84 | 67 |
| #4 | pepo | +2.03 | 65 | 54 |
| #5 | Nzk | +1.69 | 62 | 56 |





