








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 112 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 72 matches | ||
| Premier | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1580 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,885 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1777 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1266 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1690 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1152 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $538,193 of utility $164 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 30 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | F. | 54% | 92 |
| #8 | mishka | 51% | 108 |
| #9 | pinny | 49% | 61 |
| #10 | thomas | 48% | 96 |
| #11 | Byeano | 43% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Byeano | 2 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | GreatContent | 2 | 0.0072 |
| #3 | mishka | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #4 | thomas | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | pinny | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | F. | 437 | 0.22 | 14 min |
| #2 | thomas | 356 | 0.17 | 11 min |
| #3 | mishka | 344 | 0.15 | 10 min |
| #4 | Byeano | 276 | 0.28 | 9 min |
| #5 | 6CG | 141 | 0.39 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | thomas | +3.29 | 72 | 83 |
| #2 | Byeano | +2.73 | 73 | 82 |
| #3 | 6CG | +2.41 | 70 | 54 |
| #4 | GreatContent | +2.39 | 62 | 31 |
| #5 | Baraccoli | +1.99 | 80 | 69 |





