








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 349 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 185 matches | ||
| Premier | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




55 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3862 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,163 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2518 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2939 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2868 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2838 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $500,514 of utility $61 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 101 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Luciano | 61% | 137 |
| #2 | Fizz | 60% | 126 |
| #3 | joj | 55% | 20 |
| #4 | SybreN | 54% | 275 |
| #5 | ale | 52% | 345 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | joj | 55% | 20 |
| #4 | SybreN | 54% | 275 |
| #5 | ale | 52% | 345 |
| #6 | Yuzuki | 47% | 147 |
| #7 | Yoonte | 45% | 104 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SybreN | 55 | 0.0099 |
| #2 | ale | 36 | 0.0051 |
| #3 | Yuzuki | 29 | 0.0092 |
| #4 | Fizz | 26 | 0.0104 |
| #5 | Luciano | 13 | 0.0046 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ale | 690 | 0.10 | 19 min |
| #2 | SybreN | 536 | 0.10 | 14 min |
| #3 | Luciano | 332 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| #4 | Yoonte | 306 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #5 | Yuzuki | 276 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fizz | +3.65 | 91 | 55 |
| #2 | SybreN | +1.16 | 75 | 56 |
| #3 | Yuzuki | +0.46 | 75 | 47 |
| #4 | ale | +0.06 | 73 | 64 |
| #5 | Raeder | -0.39 | 79 | 59 |





