








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 540 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 50 matches | ||
| Premier | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2868 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,346 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2814 | 27% |
| Smokes | 3193 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 2637 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1702 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $387,881 of utility $83 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 82 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | they see me spinning | 62% | 26 |
| #2 | JakeAK | 53% | 87 |
| #3 | Volund | 53% | 127 |
| #4 | Stone Toad | 52% | 108 |
| #5 | mrgeppetto | 43% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stone Toad | 284 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #2 | Volund | 168 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #3 | JakeAK | 113 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #4 | mrgeppetto | 97 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #5 | they see me spinning | 84 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mrgeppetto | +2.23 | 67 | 33 |
| #2 | Satsujin | +2.04 | 83 | 71 |
| #3 | j4son | +1.47 | 74 | 53 |
| #4 | Stone Toad | +1.28 | 75 | 54 |
| #5 | JakeAK | +1.10 | 77 | 54 |





