








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 510 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 378 matches | ||
| Faceit | 104 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 98 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




74 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4885 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,425 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3640 | 17% |
| Smokes | 4433 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 7691 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 5661 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,607,583 of utility $185 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3305 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | MaccA | 52% | 229 |
| #8 | barbell connoisseur | 51% | 329 |
| #9 | CobraDevil | 48% | 238 |
| #10 | 식민지 개척자 | 46% | 54 |
| #11 | Pwasonce | 43% | 104 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | W1tcheR | 39 | 0.0097 |
| #2 | Pwasonce | 33 | 0.0136 |
| #3 | CobraDevil | 31 | 0.0059 |
| #4 | barbell connoisseur | 25 | 0.0035 |
| #5 | MaccA | 22 | 0.0043 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MaccA | 1122 | 0.22 | 29 min |
| #2 | CobraDevil | 1014 | 0.19 | 26 min |
| #3 | barbell connoisseur | 851 | 0.12 | 16 min |
| #4 | Tickle My Gooch | 426 | 0.23 | 11 min |
| #5 | Pwasonce | 398 | 0.16 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Exonity. | +2.44 | 83 | 31 |
| #2 | W1tcheR | +2.33 | 86 | 59 |
| #3 | MaccA | +2.21 | 75 | 68 |
| #4 | Tickle My Gooch | +1.32 | 76 | 68 |
| #5 | Pwasonce | +1.20 | 67 | 54 |





