








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 331 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Overpass | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1524 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,491 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1566 | 35% |
| Smokes | 1301 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 775 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 849 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $534,603 of utility $175 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 64 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ebybl1k | 77% | 22 |
| #2 | _-AstRo-_ | 76% | 17 |
| #3 | Panda | 75% | 8 |
| #4 | De Zeewier Snuivende Zeekoe | 69% | 54 |
| #5 | 4dapse | 63% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mazerfaker men( | 4 | 0.0103 |
| #2 | De Zeewier Snuivende Zeekoe | 3 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | BliksemBliksemBoeman | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | 4dapse | 2 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | Ebybl1k | 1 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 4dapse | +4.52 | 87 | 50 |
| #2 | De Zeewier Snuivende Zeekoe | +3.74 | 92 | 63 |
| #3 | Panda | +2.97 | 82 | 46 |
| #4 | 狗石丹 | +2.97 | 55 | 56 |
| #5 | mazerfaker men( | +1.01 | 83 | 57 |





