








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 189 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Office | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
987 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,851 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 425 | 23% |
| Smokes | 656 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 312 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 458 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $683,975 of utility $267 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 99 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mik125 | 8 | 0.0111 |
| #2 | Pluneto | 6 | 0.0049 |
| #3 | 4dapse | 6 | 0.0056 |
| #4 | De Zeewier Snuivende Zeekoe | 6 | 0.0073 |
| #5 | sen | 5 | 0.0219 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pluneto | 277 | 0.22 | 9 min |
| #2 | De Zeewier Snuivende Zeekoe | 135 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #3 | 4dapse | 117 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #4 | 狗石丹 | 83 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| #5 | Mik125 | 59 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 4dapse | +4.34 | 87 | 43 |
| #2 | 狗石丹 | +3.88 | 52 | 57 |
| #3 | De Zeewier Snuivende Zeekoe | +2.68 | 86 | 53 |
| #4 | Pluneto | +2.50 | 84 | 56 |
| #5 | Mik125 | +2.04 | 79 | 38 |





