








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 648 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 168 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 21 matches | ||
| Faceit | 17 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 49 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5241 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,405 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3104 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2899 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2736 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 3666 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,195,482 of utility $152 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 528 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝙥𝙨𝙮𝙘𝙝 | 78% | 88 |
| #2 | typer | 77% | 31 |
| #3 | valor | 76% | 29 |
| #4 | 𝙛𝙪𝙣𝙠 | 70% | 111 |
| #5 | Herman | 70% | 140 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | peaked early 2018 ngl | 65% | 26 |
| #8 | BiSHiKoN | 65% | 40 |
| #9 | cimota | 63% | 30 |
| #10 | jaz | 60% | 81 |
| #11 | huska | 57% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Herman | 8 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | BiSHiKoN | 5 | 0.0058 |
| #3 | 𝙥𝙨𝙮𝙘𝙝 | 4 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | jaz | 3 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | MattyS | 3 | 0.0034 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Herman | 385 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #2 | 𝙛𝙪𝙣𝙠 | 234 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #3 | 𝙥𝙨𝙮𝙘𝙝 | 199 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #4 | valor | 157 | 0.27 | 4 min |
| #5 | cimota | 146 | 0.22 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | deqny | +3.56 | 85 | 59 |
| #2 | valor | +3.14 | 87 | 64 |
| #3 | 𝙛𝙪𝙣𝙠 | +2.51 | 74 | 68 |
| #4 | typer | +1.98 | 82 | 62 |
| #5 | 𝙥𝙨𝙮𝙘𝙝 | +1.97 | 75 | 62 |





