








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1864 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 276 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 262 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 167 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 110 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 75 matches | ||
| Wingman | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Faceit | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 129 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
12926 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,771 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8403 | 30% |
| Smokes | 6989 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 5526 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 6853 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,701,510 of utility $180 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1496 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | deqny | 70% | 111 |
| #2 | ๐ฅ๐จ๐ฎ๐๐ | 65% | 302 |
| #3 | ใ
nice | 61% | 87 |
| #4 | jaz | 60% | 189 |
| #5 | huska | 58% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | ๐ฅ๐จ๐ฎ๐๐ | 65% | 302 |
| #3 | ใ
nice | 61% | 87 |
| #4 | jaz | 60% | 189 |
| #5 | huska | 58% | 59 |
| #6 | Zoox | 57% | 84 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jaz | 8 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | ๐ฅ๐จ๐ฎ๐๐ | 7 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | ใ
nice | 7 | 0.0041 |
| #4 | deqny | 6 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | huska | 3 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ๐ฅ๐จ๐ฎ๐๐ | 684 | 0.12 | 16 min |
| #2 | deqny | 350 | 0.16 | 9 min |
| #3 | jaz | 301 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #4 | ใ
nice | 258 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #5 | huska | 230 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ๐๐ช๐ฃ๐ | +3.44 | 77 | 66 |
| #2 | deqny | +3.11 | 84 | 60 |
| #3 | Zoox | +2.19 | 90 | 59 |
| #4 | ๐ฅ๐จ๐ฎ๐๐ | +1.85 | 75 | 62 |
| #5 | huska | +1.27 | 66 | 64 |





