








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 231 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 156 matches | ||
| Faceit | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 54 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2095 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,216 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2423 | 22% |
| Smokes | 2854 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 3742 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 2197 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,090,305 of utility $163 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 240 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bris cumstead | 79% | 33 |
| #2 | Meister Eder | 70% | 27 |
| #3 | greenMike | 62% | 52 |
| #4 | Falco | 61% | 82 |
| #5 | Gotsii | 57% | 58 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Sküfrük | 55% | 154 |
| #8 | Acidman on Andy | 54% | 200 |
| #9 | Schwobit | 53% | 34 |
| #10 | RYZZIE | 49% | 95 |
| #11 | Knebl | 42% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sküfrük | 9 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | Falco | 7 | 0.0040 |
| #3 | Acidman on Andy | 5 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | RYZZIE | 4 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | Gotsii | 3 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Acidman on Andy | 346 | 0.08 | 8 min |
| #2 | Falco | 254 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #3 | Sküfrük | 149 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #4 | Gotsii | 115 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #5 | hydrra | 85 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Schwobit | +3.38 | 75 | 58 |
| #2 | bris cumstead | +2.51 | 76 | 54 |
| #3 | Sküfrük | +2.16 | 75 | 49 |
| #4 | Falco | +1.81 | 66 | 62 |
| #5 | Gotsii | +1.65 | 79 | 63 |





