








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 407 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 541 matches | ||
| Faceit | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6850 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,987 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6523 | 30% |
| Smokes | 5773 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 4391 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 5300 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,646,272 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 279 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Whirly | 52% | 392 |
| #2 | donut | 52% | 161 |
| #3 | Skout | 52% | 448 |
| #4 | anime grill | 52% | 120 |
| #5 | TRL | 52% | 415 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | TRL | 52% | 415 |
| #6 | BigOrca | 50% | 149 |
| #7 | Goombaz | 49% | 172 |
| #8 | PhanTasM | 47% | 148 |
| #9 | Skraapz | 46% | 239 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TRL | 33 | 0.0039 |
| #2 | Skout | 24 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | donut | 17 | 0.0050 |
| #4 | Whirly | 11 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | BigOrca | 8 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skout | 2125 | 0.23 | 60 min |
| #2 | Whirly | 1652 | 0.21 | 45 min |
| #3 | TRL | 1353 | 0.16 | 38 min |
| #4 | donut | 802 | 0.24 | 22 min |
| #5 | BigOrca | 796 | 0.25 | 22 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skout | +2.30 | 73 | 69 |
| #2 | donut | +1.78 | 82 | 71 |
| #3 | AyeJex | +0.83 | 72 | 69 |
| #4 | PhanTasM | +0.27 | 68 | 73 |
| #5 | Whirly | +0.12 | 75 | 68 |





