








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 182 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 699 matches | ||
| Faceit | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 77 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




54 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8328 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,819 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4632 | 21% |
| Smokes | 5350 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 6415 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 5422 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,578,774 of utility $173 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 955 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝒯𝓇𝓎𝓈𝓉 ♛ | 54% | 267 |
| #2 | b l u e | 50% | 347 |
| #3 | Ralph | 50% | 699 |
| #4 | ☂️ papaJ | 49% | 69 |
| #5 | Duco | 48% | 141 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | ☂️ papaJ | 49% | 69 |
| #5 | Duco | 48% | 141 |
| #6 | Rusty | 48% | 216 |
| #7 | Devilicious | 45% | 135 |
| #8 | Vision | 44% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝒯𝓇𝓎𝓈𝓉 ♛ | 17 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | Ralph | 14 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | Devilicious | 8 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | b l u e | 7 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | Rusty | 4 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ralph | 1638 | 0.11 | 42 min |
| #2 | b l u e | 1086 | 0.15 | 23 min |
| #3 | 𝒯𝓇𝓎𝓈𝓉 ♛ | 768 | 0.13 | 22 min |
| #4 | Rusty | 525 | 0.11 | 10 min |
| #5 | Devilicious | 385 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ralph | +2.34 | 90 | 62 |
| #2 | 𝒯𝓇𝓎𝓈𝓉 ♛ | +0.69 | 83 | 57 |
| #3 | Devilicious | -0.31 | 69 | 54 |
| #4 | Heffe | -0.62 | 71 | 55 |
| #5 | Duco | -0.97 | 74 | 41 |





