








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 671 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 255 matches | ||
| Faceit | 199 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4115 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,651 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4348 | 21% |
| Smokes | 5858 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 6423 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 4022 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,922,905 of utility $185 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1433 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KISMAAHHH | 55% | 47 |
| #2 | Kentai | 55% | 33 |
| #3 | Hound | 55% | 33 |
| #4 | Pungents | 54% | 37 |
| #5 | tkefni | 51% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Hound | 55% | 33 |
| #4 | Pungents | 54% | 37 |
| #5 | tkefni | 51% | 37 |
| #6 | El Nainツ | 51% | 85 |
| #7 | ⛟ 4me | 49% | 72 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | El Nainツ | 4 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | ⛟ 4me | 3 | 0.0034 |
| #3 | tkefni | 2 | 0.0039 |
| #4 | Hound | 2 | 0.0048 |
| #5 | KISMAAHHH | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KISMAAHHH | 140 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #2 | ⛟ 4me | 128 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #3 | tkefni | 121 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| #4 | El Nainツ | 118 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #5 | Pungents | 88 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tkefni | +2.22 | 81 | 84 |
| #2 | KISMAAHHH | +1.96 | 70 | 63 |
| #3 | Pungents | +1.44 | 74 | 67 |
| #4 | El Nainツ | +1.31 | 87 | 65 |
| #5 | Kentai | +1.16 | 77 | 59 |





