








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 254 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 88 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
937 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,804 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 862 | 23% |
| Smokes | 843 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1291 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 808 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $515,405 of utility $184 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Saviner | 53% | 60 |
| #2 | Kave_in | 53% | 107 |
| #3 | GrandPa(nda) | 51% | 105 |
| #4 | Reyicel | 50% | 106 |
| #5 | TheGreySeawolf | 46% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Kave_in | 53% | 107 |
| #3 | GrandPa(nda) | 51% | 105 |
| #4 | Reyicel | 50% | 106 |
| #5 | TheGreySeawolf | 46% | 46 |
| #6 | Yueker | 41% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Reyicel | 6 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | GrandPa(nda) | 4 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | Kave_in | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | Saviner | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | TheGreySeawolf | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Reyicel | 804 | 0.36 | 20 min |
| #2 | GrandPa(nda) | 231 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #3 | Kave_in | 160 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #4 | TheGreySeawolf | 82 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | Saviner | 20 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Reyicel | +3.19 | 67 | 70 |
| #2 | Kave_in | +2.38 | 76 | 61 |
| #3 | Beatboxbandit | -0.39 | 49 | 54 |
| #4 | GrandPa(nda) | -1.48 | 72 | 55 |
| #5 | Saviner | -2.72 | 39 | 23 |





