








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 379 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 289 matches | ||
| Premier | 65 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 71 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4819 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,227 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1693 | 15% |
| Smokes | 2222 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 4236 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 3076 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $743,283 of utility $77 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 49 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | auxenovsky dA KINg! | 63% | 70 |
| #2 | amfetaminol | 58% | 55 |
| #3 | Rybak | 54% | 70 |
| #4 | eMG | 54% | 400 |
| #5 | Zaur | 54% | 370 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Zaur | 54% | 370 |
| #6 | borek | 53% | 113 |
| #7 | Perka | 52% | 50 |
| #8 | zira. | 51% | 82 |
| #9 | Black Cat | 40% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | eMG | 6 | 0.0007 |
| #2 | Zaur | 5 | 0.0006 |
| #3 | borek | 3 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | auxenovsky dA KINg! | 2 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | amfetaminol | 2 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zaur | 2216 | 0.27 | 62 min |
| #2 | eMG | 1117 | 0.13 | 24 min |
| #3 | borek | 543 | 0.22 | 12 min |
| #4 | Perka | 247 | 0.22 | 7 min |
| #5 | Rybak | 184 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kinematograf | +1.66 | 67 | 55 |
| #2 | amfetaminol | +1.39 | 70 | 58 |
| #3 | eMG | +0.85 | 56 | 58 |
| #4 | auxenovsky dA KINg! | +0.59 | 66 | 58 |
| #5 | Perka | -0.24 | 65 | 72 |





