








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 425 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 255 matches | ||
| Faceit | 171 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




67 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5717 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,221 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5248 | 23% |
| Smokes | 7330 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 5422 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 5221 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,035,259 of utility $79 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 338 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dj erdogan | 66% | 94 |
| #2 | rankasija | 64% | 67 |
| #3 | Joksuu | 64% | 80 |
| #4 | BOT Tomi | 59% | 177 |
| #5 | Spöndels | 59% | 160 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | JariNSeksiHousutPVP | 51% | 144 |
| #11 | Plasma-Aki | 51% | 89 |
| #12 | jerry offside | 49% | 53 |
| #13 | Antero Luukkonen | 49% | 35 |
| #14 | anttva | 38% | 64 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tyyb | 22 | 0.0039 |
| #2 | JariNSeksiHousutPVP | 15 | 0.0052 |
| #3 | Joksuu | 12 | 0.0077 |
| #4 | rankasija | 11 | 0.0080 |
| #5 | 🍀 J ɛ p p ɛ | 10 | 0.0062 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tyyb | 781 | 0.14 | 19 min |
| #2 | kari häkki | 547 | 0.09 | 13 min |
| #3 | Spöndels | 458 | 0.14 | 10 min |
| #4 | JariNSeksiHousutPVP | 342 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #5 | BOT Tomi | 309 | 0.09 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joksuu | +2.79 | 82 | 64 |
| #2 | BOT Tomi | +2.03 | 78 | 65 |
| #3 | jerry offside | +1.83 | 76 | 59 |
| #4 | ensio pappa | +1.43 | 80 | 50 |
| #5 | JariNSeksiHousutPVP | +1.42 | 61 | 57 |





