








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 529 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 340 matches | ||
| Premier | 42 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4832 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,351 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5699 | 35% |
| Smokes | 4816 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2413 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 3423 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,175,583 of utility $127 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 167 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | eM- | 68% | 68 |
| #2 | wingie | 65% | 68 |
| #3 | Whindanski*[p$] | 64% | 67 |
| #4 | Longo | 58% | 65 |
| #5 | EL FABIOLO | 54% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Kris | 53% | 258 |
| #8 | sp00n | 52% | 21 |
| #9 | twitch.tv/f00bie | 52% | 274 |
| #10 | Fra | 50% | 30 |
| #11 | foolio | 50% | 214 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Holl1s | 3 | 0.0005 |
| #2 | twitch.tv/f00bie | 2 | 0.0003 |
| #3 | Kris | 2 | 0.0004 |
| #4 | foolio | 2 | 0.0004 |
| #5 | wingie | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Holl1s | 1230 | 0.19 | 39 min |
| #2 | twitch.tv/f00bie | 1205 | 0.20 | 30 min |
| #3 | Kris | 423 | 0.07 | 10 min |
| #4 | foolio | 349 | 0.07 | 10 min |
| #5 | wingie | 212 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EL FABIOLO | +2.29 | 92 | 64 |
| #2 | Whindanski*[p$] | +2.18 | 81 | 62 |
| #3 | Holl1s | +2.10 | 76 | 73 |
| #4 | eM- | +1.20 | 84 | 65 |
| #5 | Fra | +0.46 | 75 | 77 |





