








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 288 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 197 matches | ||
| Premier | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 54 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2401 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,087 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2408 | 24% |
| Smokes | 3246 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 2152 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2281 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,036,660 of utility $167 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 128 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Holl1s | 51% | 276 |
| #2 | eM- | 51% | 45 |
| #3 | twitch.tv/f00bie | 51% | 261 |
| #4 | NKZ | 50% | 214 |
| #5 | Kris | 50% | 244 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Holl1s | 51% | 276 |
| #2 | eM- | 51% | 45 |
| #3 | twitch.tv/f00bie | 51% | 261 |
| #4 | NKZ | 50% | 214 |
| #5 | Kris | 50% | 244 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NKZ | 3 | 0.0006 |
| #2 | Holl1s | 2 | 0.0003 |
| #3 | twitch.tv/f00bie | 2 | 0.0003 |
| #4 | Kris | 1 | 0.0002 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Holl1s | 1182 | 0.20 | 39 min |
| #2 | twitch.tv/f00bie | 1165 | 0.20 | 29 min |
| #3 | NKZ | 1161 | 0.24 | 37 min |
| #4 | Kris | 372 | 0.07 | 9 min |
| #5 | eM- | 48 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Holl1s | +2.01 | 77 | 73 |
| #2 | eM- | +1.82 | 82 | 66 |
| #3 | NKZ | +1.08 | 79 | 70 |
| #4 | twitch.tv/f00bie | +0.16 | 61 | 74 |
| #5 | foolio | -1.02 | 59 | 66 |





