








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Premier | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1735 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,139 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 319 | 15% |
| Smokes | 437 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 789 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 594 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $594,529 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 34 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EL REDEEMED | 14 | 0.0065 |
| #2 | Shkzy | 3 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | Dissonant | 3 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | Powered by Lovense :3 | 3 | 0.0053 |
| #5 | Dion | 2 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shkzy | 354 | 0.20 | 7 min |
| #2 | EL REDEEMED | 232 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #3 | ☩ 𝕤𝓟ℛ𝓩𝟠 ☩ | 121 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #4 | Dion | 83 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | Dissonant | 50 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Powered by Lovense :3 | +6.77 | 72 | 16 |
| #2 | Dion | +4.64 | 91 | 43 |
| #3 | Dissonant | +2.36 | 56 | 42 |
| #4 | Kibikita | +1.92 | 71 | 34 |
| #5 | ☩ 𝕤𝓟ℛ𝓩𝟠 ☩ | +1.42 | 79 | 44 |





