








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 462 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2592 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,124 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3945 | 30% |
| Smokes | 3715 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2809 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2655 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $762,149 of utility $107 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 25 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Geno | 74% | 19 |
| #2 | Kibikita | 63% | 89 |
| #3 | ☩ 𝕤𝓟ℛ𝓩𝟠 ☩ | 60% | 151 |
| #4 | Dissonant | 60% | 65 |
| #5 | Dion | 55% | 128 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EL REDEEMED | 445 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #2 | ☩ 𝕤𝓟ℛ𝓩𝟠 ☩ | 244 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #3 | Dion | 207 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #4 | Trekt_GetRekt | 75 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #5 | Dissonant | 68 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dion | +5.29 | 88 | 44 |
| #2 | Geno | +2.98 | 77 | 64 |
| #3 | Dissonant | +2.55 | 56 | 50 |
| #4 | Kibikita | +2.26 | 73 | 32 |
| #5 | ☩ 𝕤𝓟ℛ𝓩𝟠 ☩ | +1.06 | 75 | 39 |





