








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 434 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 75 matches | ||
| Premier | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1947 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,710 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1138 | 31% |
| Smokes | 979 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 439 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 1154 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,074,385 of utility $290 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VezpeN | 73% | 11 |
| #2 | 4z! | 71% | 14 |
| #3 | Tomor | 71% | 17 |
| #4 | Sully | 68% | 44 |
| #5 | aN //.- | 64% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | Phishy | 57% | 35 |
| #13 | bloodymary2750 | 45% | 11 |
| #14 | p3ttS | 45% | 55 |
| #15 | Sylvester Cobblestallone | 40% | 15 |
| #16 | Primo | 30% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Anakn | 4 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | Phishy | 3 | 0.0040 |
| #3 | Firetechy | 2 | 0.0044 |
| #4 | Sylvester Cobblestallone | 2 | 0.0063 |
| #5 | p3ttS | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -r〄gue - twitch.tv/r0guue | 237 | 0.20 | 7 min |
| #2 | Cquenc3 | 219 | 0.38 | 6 min |
| #3 | Anakn | 204 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #4 | Sully | 95 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | Phishy | 95 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aN //.- | +2.94 | 78 | 74 |
| #2 | Sully | +2.38 | 73 | 56 |
| #3 | Cquenc3 | +1.48 | 81 | 74 |
| #4 | -r〄gue - twitch.tv/r0guue | +1.25 | 69 | 75 |
| #5 | BabaYaga | +0.91 | 70 | 46 |





