








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 221 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September

The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 383 matches | ||
| Faceit | 89 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4986 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,794 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3753 | 22% |
| Smokes | 4274 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 3985 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 4782 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,313,368 of utility $102 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 94 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SCHNEE | 54% | 121 |
| #2 | ᵗᵇᵒᵒᵐ | 53% | 264 |
| #3 | J.KOB | 50% | 339 |
| #4 | milesyo | 49% | 104 |
| #5 | Kung Fu Kenny | 48% | 155 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | 滾開 CS.MONEY | 46% | 136 |
| #8 | DUDE | 46% | 224 |
| #9 | GingaNinja | 45% | 183 |
| #10 | -Thxxs- | 44% | 41 |
| #11 | Dino | 40% | 58 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ᵗᵇᵒᵒᵐ | 19 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | DUDE | 11 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | J.KOB | 8 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | Dino | 8 | 0.0068 |
| #5 | milesyo | 7 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DUDE | 977 | 0.20 | 23 min |
| #2 | ᵗᵇᵒᵒᵐ | 705 | 0.14 | 17 min |
| #3 | J.KOB | 651 | 0.09 | 18 min |
| #4 | SCHNEE | 574 | 0.23 | 12 min |
| #5 | 滾開 CS.MONEY | 451 | 0.15 | 11 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SCHNEE | +2.16 | 70 | 69 |
| #2 | ᵗᵇᵒᵒᵐ | +1.67 | 76 | 61 |
| #3 | J.KOB | +1.64 | 67 | 58 |
| #4 | 滾開 CS.MONEY | +1.21 | 71 | 62 |
| #5 | milesyo | +1.08 | 71 | 52 |





