








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 808 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 252 matches | ||
| Faceit | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3741 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,465 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4163 | 29% |
| Smokes | 3382 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 4088 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 2832 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $680,234 of utility $95 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1051 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Drückeberger | 61% | 75 |
| #2 | Tris | 61% | 51 |
| #3 | YB | 54% | 286 |
| #4 | BA | 54% | 168 |
| #5 | NanZa | 54% | 142 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | NanZa | 54% | 142 |
| #6 | ricozito | 53% | 102 |
| #7 | tim128er | 50% | 28 |
| #8 | JQhnnyB | 49% | 83 |
| #9 | FlyingFero | 44% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | YB | 27 | 0.0047 |
| #2 | BA | 13 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | NanZa | 3 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | ricozito | 2 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | FlyingFero | 2 | 0.0039 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ricozito | 508 | 0.24 | 14 min |
| #2 | Drückeberger | 356 | 0.23 | 12 min |
| #3 | YB | 320 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| #4 | NanZa | 234 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| #5 | BA | 212 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NanZa | +2.38 | 85 | 68 |
| #2 | Drückeberger | +2.05 | 73 | 78 |
| #3 | AN1L- | +1.21 | 78 | 66 |
| #4 | ricozito | +1.08 | 70 | 74 |
| #5 | JQhnnyB | +0.73 | 75 | 58 |





