








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 129 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 113 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 77 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1986 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,475 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 819 | 15% |
| Smokes | 1166 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1794 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 1696 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $237,128 of utility $29 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 16 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | βͺ Bart | 56% | 52 |
| #2 | BrAiNZ | 51% | 39 |
| #3 | Floz | 50% | 48 |
| #4 | Forsaken | 49% | 41 |
| #5 | Panda | 45% | 64 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | Le Nut | 33% | 94 |
| #13 | NW_ | 32% | 25 |
| #14 | vlamlars | 26% | 27 |
| #15 | Penthius | 26% | 54 |
| #16 | α¦ π©πΎπππΏπ α¦ | 25% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RQBassie | 24 | 0.0058 |
| #2 | Le Nut | 17 | 0.0090 |
| #3 | Floz | 11 | 0.0115 |
| #4 | Penthius | 8 | 0.0072 |
| #5 | βͺ Bart | 8 | 0.0080 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RQBassie | 528 | 0.13 | 11 min |
| #2 | Le Nut | 339 | 0.18 | 6 min |
| #3 | βͺ Bart | 214 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| #4 | BrAiNZ | 153 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| #5 | Panda | 140 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | navvezzz LF1 | +4.86 | 79 | 57 |
| #2 | Floz | +4.59 | 89 | 51 |
| #3 | βͺ Bart | +4.06 | 74 | 72 |
| #4 | BrAiNZ | +3.01 | 79 | 64 |
| #5 | TAPED | +2.51 | 70 | 21 |





