








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 34 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
451 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 844 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 139 | 16% |
| Smokes | 111 | 13% |
| HE Grenades | 211 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 383 | 45% |
Our logs show you have wasted $140,140 of utility $52 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 63 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | G-Erik | 64% | 11 |
| #2 | navvezzz LF1 | 50% | 8 |
| #3 | Floz | 50% | 26 |
| #4 | βͺ Bart | 48% | 21 |
| #5 | Panda | 38% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | Polserulle | 27% | 11 |
| #12 | BrAiNZ | 27% | 15 |
| #13 | PapaJonko | 25% | 55 |
| #14 | Le Nut | 25% | 12 |
| #15 | Zolas | 0% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RQBassie | 11 | 0.0103 |
| #2 | Panda | 7 | 0.0129 |
| #3 | PapaJonko | 6 | 0.0055 |
| #4 | TAPED | 6 | 0.0106 |
| #5 | vlamlars | 6 | 0.0152 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RQBassie | 165 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #2 | βͺ Bart | 104 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| #3 | Panda | 76 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #4 | Floz | 50 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | Le Nut | 45 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Floz | +4.29 | 86 | 56 |
| #2 | TAPED | +4.21 | 72 | 18 |
| #3 | βͺ Bart | +4.06 | 72 | 69 |
| #4 | navvezzz LF1 | +3.87 | 86 | 49 |
| #5 | G-Erik | +3.78 | 86 | 63 |





