








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 361 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1697 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,562 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1020 | 22% |
| Smokes | 1149 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1093 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1300 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $733,975 of utility $196 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 45 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M's Boztrom | 12 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | bisquake | 3 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | Dante | 2 | 0.0100 |
| #4 | TheTruthFader | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | Sammy Ricebot | 1 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M's Boztrom | 860 | 0.26 | 24 min |
| #2 | bisquake | 185 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #3 | TheTruthFader | 149 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #4 | crazyfox | 96 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| #5 | Sheepy | 35 | 0.04 | 1 min |





