










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 536 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 10 matches | ||
| Premier | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3710 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,701 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2143 | 25% |
| Smokes | 3158 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 846 | 10% |
| Molotovs | 2554 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $807,114 of utility $97 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 321 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #15 | penguin | 38% | 45 |
| #16 | jENiMALcrackers | 37% | 38 |
| #17 | mchammerpants | 36% | 22 |
| #18 | Brutal | 33% | 24 |
| #19 | randy | 33% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | John T. Cowboy | 471 | 0.22 | 7 min |
| #2 | Qlick | 207 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #3 | Striker-Nick | 125 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #4 | SchloobyTubestein | 117 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | Rod wave | 106 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Qlick | +3.91 | 68 | 58 |
| #2 | Bankerr | +2.81 | 75 | 47 |
| #3 | Striker-Nick | +2.41 | 66 | 68 |
| #4 | penguin | +2.12 | 63 | 52 |
| #5 | randy | +1.12 | 58 | 48 |





