








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 687 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 308 matches | ||
| Faceit | 186 matches | ||
| Wingman | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5050 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,326 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9549 | 39% |
| Smokes | 7535 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 2546 | 10% |
| Molotovs | 4696 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,810,103 of utility $148 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1905 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | x64storm | 61% | 33 |
| #2 | Huub | 58% | 307 |
| #3 | cowmonke | 58% | 216 |
| #4 | Susanna Spector | 57% | 270 |
| #5 | homecoming | 57% | 180 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cowmonke | 7 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | Susanna Spector | 6 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | x64storm | 3 | 0.0043 |
| #4 | Huub | 2 | 0.0003 |
| #5 | homecoming | 2 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Huub | +3.56 | 89 | 54 |
| #2 | x64storm | +1.15 | 51 | 62 |
| #3 | cowmonke | +1.13 | 74 | 63 |
| #4 | homecoming | +0.71 | 71 | 58 |
| #5 | Shagga, son of Dolf | -0.03 | 76 | 70 |





