








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 12 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 82 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 47 matches | ||
| Premier | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1520 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,314 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2753 | 21% |
| Smokes | 4613 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 2452 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 3496 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $912,486 of utility $117 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lavender Singh *********** | 50% | 26 |
| #2 | Ikarin | 47% | 175 |
| #3 | Kai | 44% | 321 |
| #4 | BhooM | 43% | 222 |
| #5 | s1ay | 41% | 94 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Kai | 44% | 321 |
| #4 | BhooM | 43% | 222 |
| #5 | s1ay | 41% | 94 |
| #6 | Turbine Ryota | 37% | 70 |
| #7 | danzerDADA | 37% | 115 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kai | 12 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | BhooM | 12 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | Ikarin | 12 | 0.0035 |
| #4 | Turbine Ryota | 6 | 0.0044 |
| #5 | danzerDADA | 4 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BhooM | 853 | 0.20 | 20 min |
| #2 | Kai | 662 | 0.10 | 17 min |
| #3 | Ikarin | 496 | 0.14 | 10 min |
| #4 | danzerDADA | 328 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #5 | s1ay | 205 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lavender Singh *********** | +6.98 | 80 | 74 |
| #2 | Kai | +4.66 | 80 | 72 |
| #3 | danzerDADA | +3.27 | 84 | 57 |
| #4 | Ikarin | +3.15 | 71 | 52 |
| #5 | s1ay | -0.02 | 46 | 53 |





