








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 228 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 261 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 49 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1841 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,221 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2618 | 16% |
| Smokes | 4388 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 4789 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 4426 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $807,403 of utility $127 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 35 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mok | 54% | 204 |
| #2 | Wok Pan | 51% | 195 |
| #3 | gay swedish guy | 51% | 197 |
| #4 | Pink | 49% | 51 |
| #5 | Baab_martz | 49% | 243 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mok | 9 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | Wok Pan | 4 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | Baab_martz | 2 | 0.0004 |
| #4 | Filipias | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | Lellelelele ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) | 2 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Baab_martz | 1006 | 0.19 | 34 min |
| #2 | gay swedish guy | 575 | 0.14 | 17 min |
| #3 | Wok Pan | 549 | 0.13 | 14 min |
| #4 | Mok | 414 | 0.09 | 14 min |
| #5 | BINGUSFAN123 | 52 | 0.08 | 1 min |





