










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 298 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
612 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,589 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 338 | 21% |
| Smokes | 390 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 465 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 396 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $494,425 of utility $257 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 49 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Middleman | 58% | 33 |
| #2 | jSX | 55% | 80 |
| #3 | J-D | 55% | 31 |
| #4 | Mario_be_Trippin | 48% | 31 |
| #5 | Spevin Kacey | 25% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jSX | 2 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | Middleman | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J-D | 134 | 0.22 | 4 min |
| #2 | jSX | 119 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #3 | Middleman | 33 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #4 | Mario_be_Trippin | 28 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | Spevin Kacey | 9 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Middleman | +5.76 | 82 | 50 |
| #2 | J-D | +4.82 | 70 | 49 |
| #3 | jSX | +0.89 | 17 | 41 |
| #4 | Mario_be_Trippin | -0.85 | 24 | 58 |
| #5 | Lookman | -1.93 | 31 | 39 |





