








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 864 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 250 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 115 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 103 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 99 matches | ||
| Faceit | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 39 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7575 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 32,835 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7733 | 24% |
| Smokes | 7754 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 10291 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 7057 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,720,662 of utility $105 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 457 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | karriSツ | 63% | 206 |
| #2 | Jarii | 61% | 212 |
| #3 | Tommux | 61% | 125 |
| #4 | muussi | 58% | 283 |
| #5 | Riisi | 58% | 337 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Riisi | 58% | 337 |
| #6 | Esdeath | 58% | 436 |
| #7 | ipsu | 55% | 407 |
| #8 | Nillkki | 54% | 380 |
| #9 | Lebiiis | 50% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ipsu | 18 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | Esdeath | 16 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | karriSツ | 13 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | Nillkki | 10 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Riisi | 6 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Esdeath | 1811 | 0.20 | 54 min |
| #2 | muussi | 1415 | 0.25 | 46 min |
| #3 | ipsu | 1050 | 0.13 | 27 min |
| #4 | Nillkki | 594 | 0.08 | 14 min |
| #5 | Riisi | 528 | 0.08 | 13 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Esdeath | +1.99 | 78 | 72 |
| #2 | ipsu | +1.45 | 74 | 65 |
| #3 | Jarii | +1.35 | 63 | 69 |
| #4 | Tommux | +0.47 | 81 | 74 |
| #5 | t0d | +0.41 | 71 | 73 |





