








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 512 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 205 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 111 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 95 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 37 matches | ||
| Faceit | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7340 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,307 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4916 | 21% |
| Smokes | 6027 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 6826 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 5538 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,807,311 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 30 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lebiiis | 70% | 47 |
| #2 | Tommux | 68% | 44 |
| #3 | Jarii | 62% | 178 |
| #4 | karriSツ | 61% | 162 |
| #5 | muussi | 57% | 235 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | muussi | 57% | 235 |
| #6 | Esdeath | 56% | 435 |
| #7 | Nillkki | 55% | 360 |
| #8 | Riisi | 55% | 218 |
| #9 | t0d | 55% | 407 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Esdeath | 21 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | t0d | 7 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | karriSツ | 7 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | Nillkki | 6 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | Jarii | 6 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Esdeath | 1752 | 0.20 | 51 min |
| #2 | muussi | 1173 | 0.25 | 37 min |
| #3 | t0d | 950 | 0.12 | 28 min |
| #4 | Nillkki | 545 | 0.08 | 12 min |
| #5 | Riisi | 343 | 0.08 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Esdeath | +1.84 | 77 | 70 |
| #2 | ipsu | +1.72 | 73 | 63 |
| #3 | Jarii | +1.49 | 63 | 69 |
| #4 | Tommux | +0.67 | 77 | 77 |
| #5 | t0d | +0.27 | 71 | 74 |





