








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 162 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 74 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1076 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,958 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 867 | 22% |
| Smokes | 897 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1063 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1131 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $499,096 of utility $176 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 65 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Faultier 361 | 71% | 17 |
| #2 | SirBESTix | 60% | 10 |
| #3 | Call me LukyS | 58% | 19 |
| #4 | Neven SuBOTic | 55% | 96 |
| #5 | penguin ๐๐๐๐๐งกโค | 54% | 120 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Call me LukyS | 58% | 19 |
| #4 | Neven SuBOTic | 55% | 96 |
| #5 | penguin ๐๐๐๐๐งกโค | 54% | 120 |
| #6 | IamRoady | 50% | 52 |
| #7 | Karen | 45% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | IamRoady | 4 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | penguin ๐๐๐๐๐งกโค | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | Call me LukyS | 2 | 0.0053 |
| #4 | Faultier 361 | 1 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | SirBESTix | 1 | 0.0046 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | penguin ๐๐๐๐๐งกโค | 833 | 0.34 | 26 min |
| #2 | Neven SuBOTic | 186 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #3 | Karen | 123 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #4 | Call me LukyS | 71 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| #5 | IamRoady | 49 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | penguin ๐๐๐๐๐งกโค | +1.91 | 78 | 78 |
| #2 | Neven SuBOTic | +1.72 | 71 | 56 |
| #3 | Karen | +0.77 | 73 | 66 |
| #4 | SirBESTix | +0.36 | 58 | 58 |
| #5 | Call me LukyS | -0.68 | 69 | 68 |





