








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1357 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 320 matches | ||
| Wingman | 107 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 18 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




35 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6833 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 33,528 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12853 | 38% |
| Smokes | 8358 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 6131 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 6186 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $933,856 of utility $70 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 582 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dstry | 56% | 34 |
| #2 | β Subarashii | 54% | 120 |
| #3 | Faultier 361 | 54% | 182 |
| #4 | Call me LukyS | 53% | 94 |
| #5 | Neven SuBOTic | 53% | 335 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Karen | 51% | 146 |
| #7 | IamRoady | 49% | 135 |
| #8 | π₯KΓΆttelπ₯ | 48% | 106 |
| #9 | daryanistcool | 42% | 67 |
| #10 | osuun | 39% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | IamRoady | 13 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | Neven SuBOTic | 8 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | daryanistcool | 5 | 0.0038 |
| #4 | Dstry | 5 | 0.0070 |
| #5 | β Subarashii | 4 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Neven SuBOTic | 614 | 0.09 | 17 min |
| #2 | Karen | 417 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #3 | Call me LukyS | 385 | 0.20 | 10 min |
| #4 | β Subarashii | 237 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #5 | Faultier 361 | 217 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | penguin πππππ§‘β€ | +2.28 | 79 | 75 |
| #2 | Neven SuBOTic | +1.33 | 71 | 54 |
| #3 | Call me LukyS | +0.54 | 68 | 70 |
| #4 | Karen | +0.33 | 64 | 65 |
| #5 | Dstry | +0.30 | 57 | 63 |





