








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 60 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 52 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1047 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,954 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 681 | 23% |
| Smokes | 787 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 916 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 570 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $558,878 of utility $206 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 21 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | KCDQ jr | 40% | 10 |
| #12 | Tirf-S | 38% | 8 |
| #13 | Napo | 36% | 14 |
| #14 | LaGrosseMIte | 30% | 30 |
| #15 | BARRY | 29% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LaGrosseMIte | 12 | 0.0185 |
| #2 | Joueur 1 | 6 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | Le J. | 6 | 0.0093 |
| #4 | gecko | 5 | 0.0149 |
| #5 | Lumenex | 2 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joueur 1 | 305 | 0.19 | 9 min |
| #2 | Lumenex | 136 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #3 | Le J. | 89 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #4 | gecko | 88 | 0.26 | 3 min |
| #5 | Vìnz | 86 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -Lou'lOo™ | +3.36 | 76 | 80 |
| #2 | Joueur 1 | +3.29 | 90 | 79 |
| #3 | gecko | +3.26 | 80 | 73 |
| #4 | Le J. | +1.02 | 73 | 75 |
| #5 | Lt armEL | +0.82 | 54 | 57 |





