








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 14 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
913 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,140 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1501 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1192 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1383 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1064 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $143,866 of utility $57 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 66 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheAldorayne | 71% | 7 |
| #2 | Lt armEL | 60% | 25 |
| #3 | Le J. | 58% | 24 |
| #4 | Michel Latour | 57% | 7 |
| #5 | Joueur 1 | 56% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | DaMoClèS | 52% | 31 |
| #8 | BARRY | 50% | 18 |
| #9 | LaGrosseMIte | 47% | 15 |
| #10 | Mague RothQueu | 36% | 11 |
| #11 | Napo | 14% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DaMoClèS | 3 | 0.0050 |
| #2 | Le J. | 3 | 0.0061 |
| #3 | Joueur 1 | 2 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | BARRY | 1 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | Mague RothQueu | 1 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joueur 1 | 185 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| #2 | Lumenex | 127 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #3 | Le J. | 80 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #4 | Lt armEL | 51 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #5 | Mague RothQueu | 43 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joueur 1 | +3.85 | 88 | 75 |
| #2 | Lt armEL | +0.99 | 75 | 69 |
| #3 | Le J. | +0.09 | 75 | 83 |
| #4 | Lumenex | -0.15 | 54 | 66 |
| #5 | Vìnz | -0.16 | 52 | 71 |





