








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 136 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 133 matches | ||
| Faceit | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




62 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1530 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,282 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1371 | 22% |
| Smokes | 1155 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 2045 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 1711 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $522,387 of utility $93 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 139 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bouffeur d'anus | 65% | 17 |
| #2 | Jeanne | 61% | 23 |
| #3 | Télépéage | 60% | 25 |
| #4 | Tirf-S | 59% | 22 |
| #5 | Amandine du 38 | 56% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | TheAldorayne | 42% | 79 |
| #11 | Lumenex | 38% | 52 |
| #12 | Joueur 1 | 36% | 78 |
| #13 | DaMoClèS | 30% | 30 |
| #14 | gecko | 25% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Le J. | 16 | 0.0064 |
| #2 | gecko | 11 | 0.0215 |
| #3 | Joueur 1 | 7 | 0.0044 |
| #4 | Lumenex | 7 | 0.0063 |
| #5 | Vìnz | 7 | 0.0230 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Le J. | 429 | 0.17 | 14 min |
| #2 | Joueur 1 | 365 | 0.23 | 11 min |
| #3 | gecko | 177 | 0.35 | 6 min |
| #4 | Mague RothQueu | 157 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #5 | Lumenex | 143 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joueur 1 | +4.09 | 92 | 77 |
| #2 | gecko | +3.20 | 75 | 67 |
| #3 | Amandine du 38 | +2.63 | 91 | 80 |
| #4 | Le J. | +2.27 | 74 | 79 |
| #5 | Bouffeur d'anus | +2.10 | 74 | 68 |





