








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 315 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2314 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,796 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2521 | 32% |
| Smokes | 2327 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1029 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 1919 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $761,246 of utility $123 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 196 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ʎʞɔnp | 17 | 0.0106 |
| #2 | gloryd | 9 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | gellyyy | 7 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | trooser | 7 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | Demonara | 7 | 0.0063 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gloryd | 544 | 0.17 | 11 min |
| #2 | ʎʞɔnp | 536 | 0.33 | 12 min |
| #3 | gellyyy | 429 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| #4 | Sepicraze | 310 | 0.29 | 9 min |
| #5 | BonBonVal | 210 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ❅FrostBain❅ | +5.85 | 66 | 40 |
| #2 | TheSimeolin | +5.84 | 91 | 35 |
| #3 | ʎʞɔnp | +2.83 | 56 | 62 |
| #4 | M1sterChaos | +2.03 | 76 | 42 |
| #5 | gloryd | +1.44 | 59 | 56 |





