








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1474 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 869 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 134 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




43 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9991 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 41,481 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12242 | 30% |
| Smokes | 9241 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 11321 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 8677 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,941,057 of utility $175 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 889 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cHAd | 53% | 204 |
| #2 | Vulpes | 52% | 91 |
| #3 | pHe4r![X] | 50% | 328 |
| #4 | pietze | 50% | 94 |
| #5 | ludicrumbs | 49% | 99 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | toffelskater | 48% | 92 |
| #12 | CounterShot | 47% | 57 |
| #13 | Sneer | 46% | 54 |
| #14 | Plozi | 46% | 234 |
| #15 | Skullmarin | 42% | 116 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | YourMom420 | 17 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | pHe4r![X] | 10 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | Robban_cs | 8 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | Alicja | 7 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | Skullmarin | 7 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | YourMom420 | 872 | 0.19 | 23 min |
| #2 | Robban_cs | 783 | 0.19 | 19 min |
| #3 | Plozi | 608 | 0.12 | 21 min |
| #4 | Daniel | 584 | 0.08 | 13 min |
| #5 | Master Of Potatos | 578 | 0.12 | 17 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pHe4r![X] | +1.74 | 89 | 47 |
| #2 | Robban_cs | +1.68 | 65 | 69 |
| #3 | raf | +1.61 | 69 | 70 |
| #4 | Daniel | +0.61 | 81 | 45 |
| #5 | cHAd | +0.42 | 76 | 39 |





