








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 487 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 606 matches | ||
| Faceit | 112 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 69 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6752 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 30,052 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5250 | 17% |
| Smokes | 7763 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 8798 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 8241 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,851,078 of utility $113 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 19 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Robban_cs | 53% | 153 |
| #2 | ludicrumbs | 51% | 86 |
| #3 | Vulpes | 50% | 177 |
| #4 | pHe4r![X] | 49% | 718 |
| #5 | Plozi | 49% | 242 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Vulpes | 50% | 177 |
| #4 | pHe4r![X] | 49% | 718 |
| #5 | Plozi | 49% | 242 |
| #6 | raf | 49% | 234 |
| #7 | pietze | 47% | 180 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pHe4r![X] | 21 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | raf | 9 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | Plozi | 8 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | Robban_cs | 7 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | Vulpes | 6 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Plozi | 730 | 0.14 | 25 min |
| #2 | raf | 646 | 0.13 | 17 min |
| #3 | pHe4r![X] | 591 | 0.04 | 14 min |
| #4 | Robban_cs | 540 | 0.16 | 13 min |
| #5 | Vulpes | 482 | 0.13 | 13 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pHe4r![X] | +1.54 | 87 | 45 |
| #2 | Robban_cs | +1.15 | 64 | 69 |
| #3 | Vulpes | +0.37 | 81 | 67 |
| #4 | raf | +0.16 | 65 | 70 |
| #5 | Plozi | -0.32 | 53 | 71 |





