








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 94 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 34 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1951 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,990 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2322 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2286 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2603 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1779 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $506,576 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 13 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rawnk | 71% | 14 |
| #2 | GanjaFar | 58% | 145 |
| #3 | Hawkiee | 56% | 190 |
| #4 | Mitsu | 56% | 190 |
| #5 | Derelict | 54% | 168 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mitsu | 5 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | GanjaFar | 5 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | Derelict | 2 | 0.0006 |
| #4 | Hawkiee | 1 | 0.0003 |
| #5 | bessy | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mitsu | 1311 | 0.34 | 34 min |
| #2 | Hawkiee | 615 | 0.16 | 17 min |
| #3 | Derelict | 408 | 0.12 | 10 min |
| #4 | GanjaFar | 225 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #5 | bessy | 206 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mitsu | +3.66 | 68 | 73 |
| #2 | Rawnk | +0.96 | 58 | 60 |
| #3 | Hawkiee | +0.91 | 64 | 63 |
| #4 | Sykotic | +0.81 | 73 | 68 |
| #5 | Derelict | -0.04 | 60 | 66 |





