








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 31 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
271 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 601 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 168 | 28% |
| Smokes | 145 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 168 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 120 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $93,790 of utility $119 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 39 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cofee burger | 33% | 9 |
| #2 | chiken kebab | 28% | 18 |
| #3 | Rikuwiha | 25% | 8 |
| #4 | Nielsen | 23% | 13 |
| #5 | Tzuggi | 14% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cofee burger | 33% | 9 |
| #2 | chiken kebab | 28% | 18 |
| #3 | Rikuwiha | 25% | 8 |
| #4 | Nielsen | 23% | 13 |
| #5 | Tzuggi | 14% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | chiken kebab | 33 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #2 | Nielsen | 33 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #3 | cofee burger | 23 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #4 | Tzuggi | 21 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #5 | Rikuwiha | 3 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | chiken kebab | +2.46 | 82 | 54 |
| #2 | Tzuggi | +0.18 | 67 | 75 |
| #3 | Nielsen | -0.45 | 70 | 57 |
| #4 | cofee burger | -0.96 | 61 | 62 |
| #5 | cottomoo | -1.76 | 64 | 39 |





