








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 226 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 141 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1856 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,699 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1471 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1647 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1714 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 867 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,021,496 of utility $189 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 63 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 30yoTALENT | 73% | 15 |
| #2 | Nörte | 70% | 20 |
| #3 | Jaggre | 69% | 39 |
| #4 | Exude | 61% | 82 |
| #5 | nasツ | 57% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ken | 9 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | fabi98 | 5 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | Mickey シ | 4 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | Exude | 3 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | Jaggre | 3 | 0.0037 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mickey シ | 868 | 0.51 | 28 min |
| #2 | Ken | 703 | 0.22 | 18 min |
| #3 | fabi98 | 301 | 0.16 | 8 min |
| #4 | od1N | 185 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #5 | Exude | 176 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mickey シ | +5.69 | 94 | 88 |
| #2 | Exude | +2.82 | 76 | 70 |
| #3 | fabi98 | +0.94 | 76 | 66 |
| #4 | Ken | +0.43 | 73 | 71 |
| #5 | nasツ | +0.32 | 85 | 34 |





