








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 499 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 142 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 77 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 52 matches | ||
| Wingman | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 19 matches | ||
| Faceit | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 81 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7097 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 26,229 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7764 | 30% |
| Smokes | 6368 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 6002 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 6095 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,118,376 of utility $86 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 117 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ChaosGeneral | 74% | 175 |
| #2 | DrPogoface | 71% | 76 |
| #3 | -KeegaN- | 70% | 66 |
| #4 | katsu- | 69% | 111 |
| #5 | Diabetesbruh | 69% | 249 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | DaDavidoof 17.13.19 | 64% | 171 |
| #10 | Skorpion ツ | 60% | 77 |
| #11 | DÜNNBRETTBOHRER | 60% | 99 |
| #12 | PM | 53% | 66 |
| #13 | paddyR | 46% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xerwell | 8 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | Cheep Heep | 7 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | DÜNNBRETTBOHRER | 7 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | Diabetesbruh | 6 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | DaDavidoof 17.13.19 | 4 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cheep Heep | 863 | 0.18 | 24 min |
| #2 | Diabetesbruh | 752 | 0.17 | 21 min |
| #3 | DaDavidoof 17.13.19 | 345 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| #4 | ChaosGeneral | 275 | 0.09 | 9 min |
| #5 | Skorpion ツ | 259 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wilsonnr1 | +4.06 | 89 | 60 |
| #2 | DrPogoface | +3.21 | 75 | 66 |
| #3 | ChaosGeneral | +2.29 | 71 | 64 |
| #4 | Xerwell | +1.84 | 86 | 60 |
| #5 | PM | +1.74 | 83 | 71 |





