








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1103 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 208 matches | ||
| Faceit | 179 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 86 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




114 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6186 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 26,206 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8583 | 33% |
| Smokes | 8589 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 3666 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 5368 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,189,181 of utility $156 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1158 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TommyP123 | 57% | 121 |
| #2 | berf | 53% | 161 |
| #3 | d4n | 53% | 175 |
| #4 | KT | 53% | 132 |
| #5 | MurDoC | 52% | 243 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Panda | 50% | 209 |
| #11 | アンディ | 49% | 241 |
| #12 | jmv | 48% | 431 |
| #13 | #ReTiReD | 47% | 70 |
| #14 | Robbie Rotten | 41% | 68 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jmv | 47 | 0.0052 |
| #2 | MurDoC | 42 | 0.0083 |
| #3 | Panda | 36 | 0.0080 |
| #4 | elmod | 18 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | TommyP123 | 18 | 0.0070 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jmv | 1703 | 0.19 | 48 min |
| #2 | MurDoC | 1310 | 0.26 | 35 min |
| #3 | Conner ツ | 847 | 0.15 | 23 min |
| #4 | Panda | 800 | 0.18 | 25 min |
| #5 | d4n | 620 | 0.16 | 12 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TommyP123 | +2.77 | 87 | 59 |
| #2 | Panda | +1.82 | 73 | 71 |
| #3 | Conner ツ | +0.85 | 82 | 63 |
| #4 | MurDoC | +0.65 | 65 | 62 |
| #5 | #ReTiReD | +0.43 | 78 | 54 |





