








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 474 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 132 matches | ||
| Premier | 120 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4191 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,144 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3887 | 27% |
| Smokes | 4786 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 2608 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2863 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,130,773 of utility $129 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 209 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TommyP123 | 58% | 57 |
| #2 | #ReTiReD | 58% | 83 |
| #3 | Panda | 55% | 211 |
| #4 | d4n | 55% | 147 |
| #5 | KT | 53% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | jmv | 50% | 202 |
| #9 | berf | 50% | 40 |
| #10 | elmod | 49% | 102 |
| #11 | -->Amen!TY<-- | 49% | 43 |
| #12 | アンディ | 49% | 70 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jack | 40 | 0.0072 |
| #2 | Panda | 33 | 0.0074 |
| #3 | jmv | 17 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | MurDoC | 11 | 0.0082 |
| #5 | TommyP123 | 11 | 0.0095 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jack | 1330 | 0.24 | 39 min |
| #2 | Panda | 829 | 0.19 | 26 min |
| #3 | jmv | 793 | 0.19 | 23 min |
| #4 | d4n | 516 | 0.16 | 11 min |
| #5 | MurDoC | 366 | 0.27 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TommyP123 | +2.11 | 86 | 60 |
| #2 | Panda | +1.80 | 74 | 72 |
| #3 | MurDoC | +1.10 | 64 | 61 |
| #4 | Conner ツ | +0.98 | 81 | 63 |
| #5 | d4n | +0.57 | 65 | 55 |





