








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
747 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,379 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 926 | 39% |
| Smokes | 311 | 13% |
| HE Grenades | 669 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 473 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $249,913 of utility $125 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 56 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | plheyboi carti | 60% | 15 |
| #9 | Hyyppä | 59% | 29 |
| #10 | Fuwa #SlavaUkraini | 58% | 12 |
| #11 | Collynzen | 58% | 60 |
| #12 | nLk | 44% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Collynzen | 4 | 0.0033 |
| #2 | ai | 2 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | Fuwa #SlavaUkraini | 2 | 0.0087 |
| #4 | vorpal | 1 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Collynzen | 219 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #2 | Decadenza | 205 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #3 | ai | 131 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #4 | vorpal | 58 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #5 | happy | 28 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Decadenza | +3.71 | 90 | 71 |
| #2 | ai | +1.93 | 83 | 67 |
| #3 | Collynzen | +1.41 | 72 | 57 |
| #4 | Fuwa #SlavaUkraini | +1.15 | 70 | 57 |
| #5 | nLk | +0.96 | 84 | 74 |





