








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 824 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 380 matches | ||
| Faceit | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3734 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,938 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 399 | 7% |
| Smokes | 733 | 12% |
| HE Grenades | 2783 | 47% |
| Molotovs | 2023 | 34% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,649,258 of utility $250 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 935 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | y49ari | 63% | 32 |
| #2 | chicken pizza | 59% | 29 |
| #3 | Decadenza | 57% | 35 |
| #4 | RULLATUOLI_TAPPAJA69 | 56% | 97 |
| #5 | ai | 54% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | y49ari | 63% | 32 |
| #2 | chicken pizza | 59% | 29 |
| #3 | Decadenza | 57% | 35 |
| #4 | RULLATUOLI_TAPPAJA69 | 56% | 97 |
| #5 | ai | 54% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | y49ari | 9 | 0.0147 |
| #2 | RULLATUOLI_TAPPAJA69 | 6 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | ai | 4 | 0.0051 |
| #4 | chicken pizza | 1 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | y49ari | 185 | 0.30 | 5 min |
| #2 | RULLATUOLI_TAPPAJA69 | 145 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #3 | ai | 104 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #4 | chicken pizza | 100 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #5 | Decadenza | 69 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Decadenza | +2.87 | 92 | 69 |
| #2 | ai | +2.84 | 82 | 69 |
| #3 | y49ari | +2.14 | 79 | 66 |
| #4 | RULLATUOLI_TAPPAJA69 | +0.96 | 71 | 45 |
| #5 | Hyyppä | -0.62 | 73 | 30 |





