








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 427 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 308 matches | ||
| Faceit | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 72 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2658 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,958 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2859 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2757 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 3785 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 2557 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,329,837 of utility $174 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 591 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dUFFAjAY | 54% | 37 |
| #2 | Nakit | 52% | 29 |
| #3 | Monko | 50% | 101 |
| #4 | TeXual | 50% | 66 |
| #5 | fffeijjo | 50% | 201 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | fffeijjo | 50% | 201 |
| #6 | Stumbel91YT | 50% | 197 |
| #7 | Harge | 44% | 82 |
| #8 | Taisteluhippo Hippoilija | 42% | 50 |
| #9 | ekkis | 41% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Taisteluhippo Hippoilija | 8 | 0.0079 |
| #2 | fffeijjo | 5 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | Stumbel91YT | 5 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | Monko | 5 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | Harge | 3 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fffeijjo | 938 | 0.22 | 32 min |
| #2 | Stumbel91YT | 437 | 0.10 | 10 min |
| #3 | TeXual | 404 | 0.28 | 12 min |
| #4 | Taisteluhippo Hippoilija | 340 | 0.33 | 9 min |
| #5 | Monko | 128 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Taisteluhippo Hippoilija | +2.55 | 84 | 75 |
| #2 | TeXual | +1.64 | 67 | 82 |
| #3 | Monko | +1.36 | 45 | 61 |
| #4 | fffeijjo | +0.27 | 57 | 85 |
| #5 | dUFFAjAY | -0.12 | 71 | 64 |





